By the time violence does occur in their relationship, it’s usually after an extended period of emotional abuse, which has already ‘dulled’ the woman’s intuition and ability to assess danger.
As the violence continues, her ability to see the escalation and threat to her life deteriorates. What was once a devastating shock, has now become a part of her life.
By this stage, if and when a women does find the strength to seek help, she is usually given the same option as the woman before her – get a court order.
Yet while court rooms overflow with women that have been directed to obtain restraining orders, their cases are rarely assessed by anyone qualified to predict, whether a court order is enough to keep them safe.
It’s a bullshit blanket approach that doesn’t take into account that all offenders are not created equal.
Whilst we respect and commend the work that law enforcement do, this ‘one size fits all’ approach to intimate partner violence can leave many women in an increasingly dangerous situation:
- When is the last time anyone ever heard of a sociopath or psychopath being deterred by a piece of (legal) paper?
- Or someone with a cluster B personality disorder being reformed by an anger management or domestic abuse program?
Why do many parole boards now require a qualified psychologist to be present before a prisoner is accessed for release, yet nobody with any such qualifications is present when a woman facing domestic violence is advised by a ‘lay person’ to get a court order?
The ‘legal system’ has for some time been smart enough to recognize that psychopaths and other cluster B personality disorders can pass lie detectors, and charm their way through parole hearings. But not intelligent enough to realize that the very same (cluster B personality disorder traits) her partner has, may trigger her partner to escalate, because she sought legal help.
As we wait for the bureaucracy and red tape to catch up, millions of women each year are being left vulnerable, by a legal system that is failing them.
Resulting in millions of women being left completely unaware, of how dangerous following ‘one size fits all’ safety advice, can be.